Meriam-Webster defines courage as: “mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty”. However, I like the definition from Malcolm Gladwell in his book David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants. “Courage is not something that you already have that makes you brave when the tough times start. Courage is what you earn when you’ve been through the tough times and you discover they aren’t so tough after all.” And having earned courage; it allows you to give hope to others that are in those same types of situations you have faced. In my life there are two courage learning times that stand out.
On August 15th, 2013 I was on a ladder cutting a tree branch with a chain saw. The branch falls on the ladder, I jump, my leg gets caught in the bottom rung; and I’m lying on the ground with my right tibia and fibula broken in several places. In that moment, I had anything but courage. I was crying and looking at a leg turned sideways; thinking I’ll never walk or hike again without a cane. It became a journey of relying on others for everything and having a sense of complete helplessness. I couldn’t drive for six weeks, needed help walking anywhere in the house, and when a storm hit at 3 am with over flowing gutters and water seeping into the house, Arlene and the kids had to take care of it while I could do nothing. And yet, there was a recovery that grew stronger over time. The bones healed with the titanium rod forever in my leg, strength came back, six months later I did the Manitou Incline, and three years later I hiked the Grand Canyon Rim 2 Rim in one day.
A few years before that on September 9th, 2009 I got the call and was told that after 29 years at Bell Labs/AT&T/Alcatel-Lucent, I was being laid off as part of a force reduction. In this case, we were driving home from my uncle’s funeral and I’m taking this call while driving on the Interstate in Illinois. Again, anything but courage; I looked at Arlene and said “I just got laid off; I think you should drive the rest of the way home.” With two kids in college, three more at home, and having one income (which was now gone), I was a mental wreck. I remember staying up till midnight working on job applications, trying to go to sleep, and then being wide awake at 4 am, looping in my mind on all the next steps I needed to take. Then two months later, I was interviewing at Cognizant and starting to work in early December.
In both these life situations, I found that while hard at the moment; they aren’t life ending events and that there are lessons to be shared and hope to offer to others. With my leg break the hope offered is: it’s ok to rely on others, take time to read books, you will be healed, and will come back stronger than ever before. In the job loss, the hope offered is to see this as “once in a life time event – a gift”, so take a vacation on a beach for a month (I still regret I didn’t do this), know that you will land another position, and see this as an opportunity to do something different or move. In our case, a year after being laid off/getting a new job, we moved from Wheaton, IL. to Monument, CO. And just think; I’m only able to write these Trail Tips because I was initially laid off.
While your situations may be different, I know that we all go through these huge life events. We have the opportunity to gain courage through them, learn lessons, and offer hope to others. So use your new courage to give hope to those around you who think they will never get out their current situations.
Al Andersen 